Stan leaves in nine days. Eight tomorrow. I�m just not sure I�m ready to deal with that little bit right yet. It�s not the three months that is going to bother me really. I mean, it will bother me, but it�s the four years after that. If he gets in. Four years is a long time. Even with leaves and visits. Oh well, he may not even get in, so I�m not going to worry about that right now.

What I guess I�m hoping to do is to continue losing weight the whole time Stan is gone. I figure I can take off another twenty pounds by the time he gets back. I�m just so sick of being shy about my body around him. Maybe shedding another twenty or so will help out in that department. But for now I just need to take off that extra ten that I gained and I will be happy. It shouldn�t take me that long with the way I�m going now. I hope anyway.

It just feels so good to be back in control again. I was way out of it for a while there. I was eating everything in sight just cause I told myself I could. Now I feel better anyway. I�m working out again too. On the days that I�m home that is. Which isn�t going to be that often this week cause he�s leaving so soon. But I feel better for working out too. I hadn�t done that for a long time either.

I hope that ten pounds comes off fairly quick. I can really feel this extra weight gain. I wasn�t able to before cause I never actually let myself stop and think about it because I didn�t want to stop eating. When I actually took a good look at myself and realized I could feel it was when I started back on the old diet wagon. I�m glad I did. I feel better but I can still feel it.

But I do feel real good about how good I�ve been about my eating this week. I�ve allowed a few treats and still managed to lose five pounds.

Held Back--Let Go

Clix me!

days until Stan goes to basic